weaving our way to Texas one connection at a time

Hello, Love :)

I apologize for my absence.

When I started this blog, I had intentions of posting every day. I look forward to when I do.

I shared recently that my mission and vision was too big to share from the small screen of an old iphone. Well, I am uber excited to announce that I finally have my laptop back!

So, now, I am going to send out rockets of desire for mobile wifi. Having to travel to a McDonalds, a Starbucks, or a library to connect online has been my next level of challenge that I am ready to alleviate :)

So, having said all of that...

We had a huge shift in our journey.

After 3 weeks of free roaming Oregon, connecting with people, places, and experiences, we got called to speak at Rethinking Everything (a huge alternative life conference) in Texas.

I am going to speak on living nomadically, the internal journey and the physical specifics.

I know that this is an incredible opportunity to connect with my people, to reach further. But, like BurntWoodsStock, I have no idea the depths and breadths this experience will reach.

I just know I need to get there.

So, this has taken my trust journey to a whole new level.

In retrospect, I am seeing how taking off for Oregon was kinda easy. We had the gas money. We just had to show up.

This has been a different experience altogether. We didn't have the gas. We had no idea the exact "hows" to this experience, just that we were going to continue to do hair ropes wherever we could to fund our gas and conference stay (hotel room share stay).

So, so far we have made it from Newport, Oregon back down the coast to San Diego. We left there yesterday and are currently in Arizona, with enough gas to get to the Texas border.

So many times, I have felt the panic start to rise. Once or twice, I even had to accept the fact that maybe getting to the conference might not be the end result.

And then the next thing unfolded before us, paving the way.

We are almost there, and I know we will make it. However it will happen, it will.

This has been a HUGE journey of expansion. I felt it when we entered Encinitas again, and I noticed how much I had grown in our journey.

I feel deeper connected than ever.

You know what else I have been really realizing recently?

I am my hero.

All those people I looked up to for living so deeply, so authentically, so connected, so sacred. The wise women, the shamans, the earth people.

I am one of them.

This is deeply fulfilling for me.

Everywhere I go, I am reminded of this.

Everywhere we go, I speak with people. I connect deeply with people. I find my people.

And that is incredible.

But a part of my journey recently has been really being aware of how much I love myself.

I have been flushing out some bits still. There is a Pink song where she talks about feeling

Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood
Miss "no way, it's all good", It didn't slow me down
Mistaken, Always second guessing
Under estimated, Look, I'm still around

Pretty, pretty please
Don't you ever, ever feel
Like your less than, less than perfect.
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like your nothing
You are perfect to me.

Wow, it triggers me every time, even just sharing the lyrics with you here.

Underestimated is the gut kicker.

I never really believed in my self, in the deeper part of me that I longed to embody but was afraid to do so and fail.

Now, I am so deeply connected, and it allows me unfold so deeply and simply with the people I connect with in our journeys.

My people. They are everywhere.

Community builders. Authentic livers. Creatives. Sacreds. Soul sisters and soul brothers.

Be still my heart.

I feel so acutely aware of the web of us that I am a part of.

I am overjoyed to travel and connect personally with people, to have new connections in communities around the country.

I feel this global community unfolding one pocket at a time. I feel myself heading in a direction to impact the world.

I feel myself being capable of this huge epic calling in life. To gather people and create spaces that reach to heal and nourish the world.

I am not longer afraid. I am not afraid of the fire. I know that I am the embodiment of the phoenix. I am that which I was afraid of.

Now, I am not afraid.

And my whole life and world (my little family, my bigger family, my tribe) are all a reflection of this.

We are all stepping into our power, more deeply connected and loving, more an expression of abundance.


So, here I am. In Sedona, Arizona. A beautiful, incredible little artsy community (like none I have ever seen!) with massive red rock plateau backdrops, inviting the mysterious, opening up the space in my life to accept the abundance that is swirling all around and accessible if we can be open enough.

That is what this journey is all about for me. Opening up. Expanding. Trusting. Connecting to Source.

I want to invite you to step into this giant hug. I want to find new ways to connect with you. I am on Facebook, and I am here, and I have a few e-mails.

How best do I connect with you, beloved reader?

How best do I enfold you in this massive, and yet deeply personal project and vision?

To what depths do you want to be involved?

I have been feeling drawn toward business. But it has not unfolded the way I was previously attempting. I think I am meant to find the ways to make this my life's work.

I know that finding ways to gather us together and stay connected feels like the best first step.

And I am craving dialogue from you. I have a lot to say, and I have replayed and refined my ideas for years. I want to hear you, often, constantly. I would love to create a space that makes symbiotic dialogue easy.

That is what I was hoping for with this blog space. I wanted people to be able to comment. I am worried that the comment-ability is not easy. I want to adjust that.

Also, I have a Facebook group that has been as neglected as this blog, unfortunately. But it is chocked full of soulful community deliciousness. It is called Being Tribe. Please feel free to come find it if you want to be a part of community dialogue.

In addition to sharing my big heart journey here and connecting with beloveds on Facebook, my other big internet experience has been requesting donations to fund our journeys.

It has been that the big heart donations people have gifted us have catapulted us into a much further trajectory than it seemed possible.

My wish list manifestation list is shared in the sidebar, and all donations go toward whatever is most salient at the time of receiving.

I have been spending some depth time wondering over requesting donations. I have been loving weaving hair ropes for people along our journey.

And I am feeling drawn toward wanting to offer my e-book "Whole Family Learning" to people who donate.

Once I get Microsoft Office Student again, I have a plethora of e-book and e-course ideas I would love to share.

Please, please, let me know what you are interested in hearing more about from me. I would love to share more about it. I would love to offer a fair energy exchange for donations - whatever you feel called toward, be it my most sincere gratitude, an e-book, some time to connect, some listening while you process, a personalized e-mail to you about some subject you want to know more about.

Please be in touch with me if you feel inclined to donate monetarily and have room for me to connect in your life.

All my love,
V

How an Intentional CommUNITY Heals

I believe the right communities are just what this world needs to heal and grow. 

The right community heals individuals, as well as reaching outward to connect communities, eventually growing to heal the world. 

Can you see that? Did I make that clear enough? It's so clear in my head, and once I start thinking about it, it just takes off like a spiraling rocket. I might get ahead of myself. 

Let me start a little more simply. 

Let me start with what I mean by "right" community. 

Whenever I use the word "right", what it means is aligned, balanced, on a path that feels right, that feels YES!

I believe the right community is like a formula. Like community alchemy. By gathering the right balance of energies, a community becomes capable of healing, of nourishment, of sustainability (not just on the land), of abundance, of greatness. 

When a community cultivates a system where checks are automatically embedded in the way people interact, to honor love and connection and nonviolence and individuality and freedom, the result is healing and abundance. 

That was probably vague, right? I tend toward being abstract, so what I am saying can be applied broadly. 

Let me share some examples of how I feel this will play out. 

A system of checks, based on love and connection and freedom might mean having it preplanned to invite beloveds in with the expectation that they might be feeling resentful about the amount of work or the kind of work that other people do, in relation to their own work. 

When we honor a child's freedom and individuality, from a place of love and connection and nonviolence, we allow them to unfold in the way that feels right to them, and what we will observe over time is a person who knows themself well, who is crystal clear on their interests, skills, abilities. What we will find is a person who knows what they have to offer and what they need to sustain and nourish themselves, a person who is attuned to their own greatness and personal design. 

I just realized that I am being called to explore these values (love, connection, nourishment, abundance, nonviolence, and so many more) in more depth, so I now plan to create posts for each of these. These puzzle pieces will help with the ah-has :))

So, lets pretend we have explored what each of these values mean in depth, and that we understand how each piece creates the formula for a whole and right community. 

Lets imagine this community has agreed that these are the values they INTEND (intentional) to live by. 

But it's unrealistic to expect everyone to come in at the same level in practicing and living these values. And it's unrealistic to expect that anyone will practice any (and especially ALL) of these values perfectly. 

That's where community healing comes into play. 

The values are to be practiced, never possible to perfect. And we honor people on their own paths. And we aim toward far-off goals, but accept where we are now and invite imperfection. 

If we keep the energy vibration up high (if we are genuinely happy), it is easier for us to live in our intentions. 

Lightness of being, ease, flow, a sense of humor - these are like soul food. We want to grow and harvest these in large bounty. 

We need our soul food to do our soul work. 

Each of us has a unique trade, a unique gift, a unique set of interests and abilities and skills to offer the physical community - be it gardening, animal care, structure building, art, playing with children, emotional upliftment. 

None of us were made to do all of these things, and even if we were capable, how would we find the time to give each one it's proper honor?

We were made for tribes. We were made to be able to live our own design and to compliment each other. 

As soon as we are living where someone picks up the pieces that we don't love to do, we see very clearly what we were made to do, what makes us come alive. And when we have a whole community of people who are living what makes them come alive, THAT is greatness. Can you imagine what a community like that is capable of?

They are like a superhero squad - except they number much higher, so their trajectory is much further. 

Can you imagine a community with even just one person whose superpower was manifestation, or helping people actualize their dreams? In a community full of people with big dreams!!

I feel greatness. 

Big epic greatness. 

Can you imagine how healing it would be for any person to step into that space and be enveloped in that love and trust and joy and honor? 

With a big enough community, the healing could reach far and envelop a great many <3

The world? Of course. Let me explain how. 

Let's say this particular community is located outside of a big city in Oregon ;)) The community, in its greatness, reaches out into the city to heal the needs in the city, providing food, shelter, love, creative ideas, and other resources to people who live in the city and are reaching out for help. 

Lets say this community offers workshops and retreats, giving people the opportunity to come in and be enveloped, and maybe those people (who have now felt true love and hope and trust and sustainability) start creating more of that in their life. 

Lets say this community helps people who live in the city to create little pockets of community to meet their needs and heal their hearts and lives. 

Lets say this community offers their model to other budding intentional communities. Lets say they even drive a veggie-powered bus around on tour to offer physical assistance to these budding communities, and to cities farther than the ones right next to their home. 

Lets say the masterminds in their community come up with all kinds of creative solutions to heal the needs of and sustain communities around the world. 

The possibilities are limitless. 

Permaculture has a similar model to the one I am speaking of. It looks a little something like this...

The outside are the pieces, the values and the physical parts of sustainability. The inside of the spiral shows how healing, sustainability, love - all the values - grow from a personal level outward. 

I think my own model would be a bit more complex and 3D :) Ooh, now it has me thinking :))

Anyway, it is nice to see such similarity, and to know that large groups of people are on the same wavelength as I am. 

I would love to hear you <3 Please feel free to comment or contact me for more depth and privacy at wildsacredsoul(at)live(dot)com

You are beloved,

V

Opening to trust

Hello, Loves <3

I haven't written in a few days. You can only begin to imagine how challenging it is to live a full life, be growing a huge dream tribe, and sharing all of it from the touchscreen of an old phone. 

I'm so ready to have my laptop back. My dreams and projects are way too big for this little phone :)

So, we landed in Newport, in the heart of resourceville, thank goodness. All of the community resources are within a few blocks from where we are at. 

And we landed at the perfect time of the season and of the month. There are more resources available throughout the 2 weeks that we will be there than, there have been any other time of the year. 

Churches having bar-b-ques in the park and enfolding us into the fellowship. Churches offering hot meals and clothing, that only happen once a month. A newly emerging food bank that is starting next week. 

Blessed. Guided. 

Grateful <3

Because this is the part in our journey where things get tight financially. We spent the bulk of our monthly income getting up here. And things were more expensive than I had anticipated. 

We landed in Newport with 0 miles left on the van's estimation of how far we could drive before we ran out of gas, a bag of snack items for food, and not a dollar to our name. 

Thankfully, a friend did some googling, while I did some internal work, and found us some resources. 

I'm learning that I need to have fuel and resources to make these big gigantic dreams come true. 

All of my being is funneled into the manifestation of this vision, this purpose. And that's a lotta being. 

And it gets tired when the fuel runs out, and that ain't a pretty sight <3

Thankfully, the community resources here in Newport are keeping my reserves from being depleted, but my dream is so big and requires more fuel. 

I have some serious tribe-gathering to do, and we need resources to do this.

So, I'm taking a new plunge. 

I have been feeling called toward fund-raising, toward providing a wish list for folks who love us, believe in what we are doing, and want to be a part of this journey. 

For these beginning stages, we are humble. 

Our wish list is: 

- getting my laptop fixed so I can more efficiently do what I am being called to get done

- get a Verizon or AT&T phone that creates a hotspot, so we can connect with people more efficiently and personably

- get fliers and business cards made to find and stay connected to our people

-event expenses (like gas, admission, and possibly camping) to connect with likehearted folks in bulk :)

- a homebase - we need somewhere to work from, somewhere to recharge our batteries at night and during some days when we have deep work to do (like a campground site, or a kindred's home, and eventually our own space)

That's our current wish list. 

Humble, I know. We are simple folks. 

Of course, financial donations will be applied to those things in whatever order of salience the day is calling for :)

You can send monetary donations to my Paypal account at wildsacredsoul@live.com or we can arrange another means if Paypal doesn't do it for you. 

With these blessings, our ability to manifest this vision will grow. The best part about me is that when I feel blessed, it is a catalyst for me to take that blessing and catapult into some far-reaching trajectory. 

I was made to require support, and when I have it, I can do anything I put my mind to. 

I am learning to open up to trust. I had opened so widely to trust when we were in Encinitas. It became so easy in a town full of such smiling and kind people, and a strong homestyle community. 

And now we are in the real world. 

Strangers. Often not the smile-iest. 

And always a fear of being a burden. 

I remind myself that people believe in what we are doing. In Encinitas people believed in the mama I am and the love I am. 

I am opening to trust now, that people believe in me following my most deep-hearted dream to create a community that nourishes the people who are a part of it, and as far reaching into the world as I an heal. 

We really are simple people. Anyone who knows us knows we don't require much, and we generate so much joy and love from the little we receive. 

And I can't help thinking how much more joy and love I could generate with more resources. 

That is really what this dream is. 

It's an opportunity to create the utopia that my family deserves, to create a utopia for so many beautiful families who are ready to live in a way that is gentler on this earth and oh-so full of the kind of abundance that doesn't drain the earth's resources. 

To become self-reliant, so we don't need much from the outside world to sustain us, and then everything we get we can give back, we can pay forward into this big beautiful bountiful world of possibilities <3

Community heals. I believe this. And that is what this vision is all about. It's about healing the people who are a part of it, and growing it to heal the world. 

We are starting small - a working laptop, a phone, some fliers, connection, a comfortable resting/recharging and working space. 

Can you help us with that?

If you want to contact me personally, please feel free to e-mail me at free(dot)mama(at)live(dot)com. 

I still owe you an update on the tribe and gobs of pictures. 

You will love them. 

I will be back soon. 

I love you,

V

The vision

I had been growing it over the last 6 years. Through sisterhood connections and tight-knit community interactions. Through internal reflection on my needs and books like The Continuum Concept. Through dialogue with kindred souls and dream visions. 

And then it crystallized at ren faire a few months ago. 

After a day of ale jam (drums and belly dancers and ale and an accordion player!), being surrounded by the most unique and amazing people, and gypsy children in the playground equipment drumming... I woke up knowing this needed to be my life. 

I spent a few years in my early teens traveling with my mom and working at state fairs and super sales. The faire life felt most like home to me. 

Just a few months before, I attended my first circus, and I wanted to run away with them. Generations of families living and traveling together, living extraordinary lives, doing interesting and incredible things. 

I was made for this. 

I started journaling and channeling that morning after faire. And it all became clear. 

I wanted a tribe. I wanted late night drum jams around a blazing bonfire and kids running around in packs and adults doing incredible and interesting things and an atmosphere of fun and uniqueness and togetherness and play. 

I wanted to host festivals. And I wanted to have retreats. I wanted to create a village where adults had spaces to do their incredible things and kids could get involved and learn, where the community could come visit and be enfolded in our spectacular togetherness. 

And I want it to be grounded in a movement toward sustainability. And I want to teach workshops to the surrounding communities on sustainability - but not just a lecture. I want people to come get their hands in our earth when we learn about permaculture. And I want to walk them around our tribe and show them our nature systems and our alternative energy sources and our natural water collection. And I want to introduce them to our big giant family and talk about journeys when we do workshops on communication and connected togetherness. 

I want to host retreats for self and spirit and soul nourishment, and for deep learning. Art, yoga, mamahood, communication, food, sharing circles. We have so much space in us for deep nourishment and healing. 

I want to sell the excess from our gardens, orchards, groves, and craft circles at a farmers market or at a stand down on the road, where the older kids can make a business. Or bring the community up to our own marketplace or to pick their own fruits, veggies, and nuts. And I want to grow plenty, so we can share with our furred and feathered neighbors as well. 

I want to have an animal rescue (domestic and farm), and my oldest (the animals whisperer) and her kindreds can soothe and heal the emotional wounds of these beloved creatures, so they will be ready for new loving homes. 

And I want to give our own tribe creatures a good life of green shaded pastures, nourishing food and plenty of clean water, and lots of gentleness and love. Maybe to aid our sustainability, like gathering our own eggs and humane and loving goat milking. Learning how to live with our furred and feathered friends in a way that honors and respects them and nourishes us all. 

I want to have a red tent where women can gather and circle in togetherness to celebrate moon cycles and rites of passage. For our tribe, and to envelop the surrounding communities. Nourishment of the divine feminine and of the sacred. 

I want to have spaces for art creation for all ages, and I want our little village to be a reflection of the artfulness of our tribe. Art as therapy. Art as a way of expression and beauty. Art as a craft. Art as a way of being. 

I want to be a haven for young mothers, especially pregnant teens, to come feel real, deep, unconditional love, to heal their past and nurture their bodies and hearts and souls, to be available to be the most loving and nurturing mamas they can be <3

I want to provide birth services to the greater community surrounding us. Birth empowerment to mamas and families. Hot meals and a bit of home cleaning for a couple weeks following the birth, so the family can cocoon themselves in their babymoon. I want to gather scraps that thrift stores cannot sell and have sewing circles to make cloth diapers that we donate into the community. 

I want to have a living library, which is more than just books - musical instruments, learning supplies like microscopes and puzzles, artifacts like bones and arrowheads. 

I want to have a community closet. 

I want to gather regularly for pow wows where we share voices and hearts about our community. 

I want shared days of personal and togetherness growth, like a day of silence, where it is understood that the brothers and sisters who feel called will be nonverbal. And we will aim toward the quiet all around. 

And maybe days of fasting. Retreats for our tribe. The possibilities are limitless. 

I want tribe business. And tribe businesses. Everyone finding their favorites in life and being supported by each other to find ways to create abundance from that place. 

We will all have specialities, and I want to encourage that, and know that together we compliment each other to create a greater whole. 

I want to accept donations and sponsorships as a nonprofit, so we can give back so much to the community easily. 

I want to gather our tribe way of being and create a model that we can share with groups who want to grow their own tribes. 

Our tribe will be centered around sacred sustainability + wild abundance. 

I envision the adults loving what they do and there being such a variety of interesting things that they do. And of the kids observing and being involved in the work, as their interests dictate. But in a world so colorful, of course the kids are going to grow interests in the things around them. 

A place where play and art are valued just as deeply as ditch digging, gardening, and blacksmithing. 

Where people, creatures, and the earth are of the most sacred, and we treat and honor them as the treasures they are. 

A place that thrives on love and joy and fun and whole being nourishment. 

A place that thrives because everyone who experiences it in some way falls madly deeply in love with it and wants to be a part of it. 

A place that people travel long distances to partake in and contribute to. 

A place where people stay for as long as their hearts and souls need to. 

For some, a haven to refill their cup for a few days, for some a healing retreat, for some a home. 

I have big dreams. Big big visions. 

And this tribe vision keeps growing, as I connect with people and their ideas and dreams, and my vision envelops theirs and becomes fuller. 

The magic of this space is that it is big enough for everyone to bring their dream and add its manifestation to our collective abundance. 

We all benefit from supporting each other in the actualization of our wildest dreams. 

I think I am going to end this gigantic vision posting with that. 

It's worth repeating. 

We all benefit from supporting each other in the actualization of our wildest dreams.

I love you. Love each other <3

V

Counting down the days...

Tuesday.

Today is Tuesday.

That leaves 3 more days in this town.

This town we fell in love at first sight (and feel) with. This town we have grown to deeply feel "home" with. This town that will continue to be home for many of our beloveds.

And we will wish it a sacred and wet farewell, as we will begin our trek northward.

So many people to see and love before we go.

Community beloveds, family members, friends.

I know us moving to Oregon is right, and I ground myself in that when I start to feel so sad about leaving the incredible people here that we love with all our hearts.

It hurts. And that hurt has stopped me from going for many years now.

But Oregon keeps calling. A soft whisper. A knowing reminder. Soft and loving.

It's where we are meant to be.

Green, rain, Pacific Ocean, affordable housing, land, hippies. Perfect.

I have been dreaming big wild dreams of a tribe on land, and I am ready to manifest that. And I am excited about the journey to get there.

I envision spending time in communes, intentional communities, and eco-villages.

I envision festivals and fairs and farmers markets.

I envision landscapes that will take our breath away.

I imagine connecting with people who will warm my heart and nourish this little Tribe idea seed that is gaining momentum deep in the earth, preparing to burst through the soil and bask in the sunlight.

I look forward to manifesting space for my family's needs to be met, and for our wildest dreams to come into fruition.

My oldest wants to be a large animal vet. She has always had a kinship with animals. They bring her peace. And after 2 years of not having her own room, she very much looks forward to decorating and caring for her own space. And getting some furried bedmates again :)

My son just wants room to spread out his playspace and endulge in combat + adventure + action figure social skills for deep long periods of time. And Netflix. Our own wifi is a must :)

And the baby. She wants to gather her dollies and care for them. And follow her sister around caring for goats and horses and chickens and all other 2- and 4-legged friends that come to join us in our homesteading adventure.

And me? Well, I want to take root deeply and grow. I want to grow a home. I want to grow a business. I want to grow a tribe, a lively community-family who lean toward sacred sustainability and wild fun, who dream together, play together, live together, love together, grow together. I want drum circles and dancing and bonfires and a red tent and kid wonderland and hammocks in faery eutopia and treehouses and gardens opportunities to share my all through workshops and services, and, and, and.

Oh, I have been dreaming of this for years. This list is oh-so long, and it keeps growing.

I look forward to showing it to you, like a story that unfolds through our upcoming journey.

I look forward to chronicling, not only our trip up to Oregon and around Oregon while we find the right place to call home, but also the sprouting and budding of a tribe come true, the depths, the details.

I hope that someday, I will be able to create a model of the tribe that has been my clear vision and purpose, so that I can share that model with ones who aspire to create tribes of their own.

I don't know all the words yet. The language. I just have a big clear vision and feeling, that I have been refining for about 6 years, through creating an online tribe, studying about tribal communities, hanging with unschoolers and faire folks, experiencing shamanic dreams and visions, and doing a bit of research on fellow intentional communities.

There is just so much room for growth, and I am excited to already be gathering beautiful souls into my life who want to grow this with me.

Until next time, all my love,
V